Friday, 31 January 2014

Hurt

Always.
Always thought that somehow, I am important. 
To anyone.

I feel lonelier than ever.
I wish I'm in better condition. 

I care to much. 
To my family, friends. God knows maybe I care for strangers too.
I'm that person they find if they need helps.  
And be forgotten right after that. 

Do you know what's the worst thing? 
I'm the one who gets hurt at last.
Everytime. 

Because no one appreciate me. 

Always be left out in conversations.
Out of sight.
Out of essential.

They would say maybe I'm just too sensitive.
The truth is that I'm hurt. 

Hurt. 
Because no one appreciate me. 

Saturday, 18 January 2014

:/


Jan 16th 14'


 

"Bridge Of Light"

Just when you think
Hope is lost,
And giving up
Is all you got,
And blue turns black,
Your confidence is cracked,
There seems no turning back from here

Sometimes there isn't an obvious explanation
Why the holiest hearts can feel the strongest palpitations

That's when you can build a bridge of light,
That's what turns the wrong so right
That's when you can't give up the fight

That's when love turns night time into day,
That's when loneliness goes away,
That's why you gotta be strong tonight,
Only love can build us a bridge of light

When your feet are made of stone
And you're convinced that you're all alone
Look at the stars instead of the dark
You'll find your heart shines like the sun

Let's not let our anger get us lost
And the need to be right comes with way too high a cost

That's when love can build a bridge of light
That's what turns the wrong so right
That's when you know it's worth the fight

That's when love turns night time into day
That's when loneliness goes away,
That's why you gotta be strong tonight
'Cause only love can build us a bridge of light

Deep breath, take it on the chin
But don't forget to let the love back in

That's when love can build a bridge of light
That's what turns the wrong so right
That's when you can't give up the fight

And that's when love turns night time into day,
That's when loneliness goes away
That's why you gotta be strong tonight
'Cause only love can build us a bridge of light

Only love can build us a bridge of light...

Of light....
Of light...




Jan 9th 14'

My Birthday

Im nineteenth. 
January 9th.
Start with a warm morning.
My friends were awesome.
Later i got home.
Took the bus.

Surprises. 
Cakes and present.
I thought everything was perfect.
Until now.

The very moment. When i should be sleeping.
I miss my damn *****
My heart hurts.
U know when i have nobody i have that.
Not now.

Almost cried every time i think of it.
2 weeks.
That was how long i had it in my hands.
In my possession.

Now im doomed.
Im not happy.
Still.

The thing is, i cant do anything about it. 


Jan 1st 14'

Happy New Year

Here it goes. 
People wishing happy new year to everybody.
I tweeted.
"At least everybody else is happy, happy new year people."
Almost everyone talk about new year resolutions.
Here's mine.
Nothing.

Because I'm not planning or setting anything for it to be taken away from me. 

I'm not happy.
This moment that would be very true. 
I'm miserable.
Stuck.

Welcome back January.
8 days till my ninetieth birthday.
 
Here goes nothing. 

Dec 20th 13'

HAPPY BDAY ADIK

Definition of a sister: A person who knows you inside and out and still thinks the world of you. Yep, that sounds like you. Thank goodness you’re my sister. Even though we argue with each other, yell at each other and irritate each other, I consider you my BFF through thick and thin. I love you, sis! Happy birthday 💜

Dec 27th 13'

LOST.

Day 4th feeling vulnerable. Helpless. Stuck and wasted. 
No one, no one will understand how I feel. 
But he needs help. And I'm in no condition to help. 
All I can do is let him take it. 
So i let it go. 

Later,
What should I do later?
Should I stay away?
Or pretend everything is fine?

I'll stay away.
I shouldn't let myself care too much.
Because,
When I let myself care, 
I'm the one who ended up getting hurt.
Why?
Because they don't care.

They don't care that I care.
That's what happened before.
I will not let it happen again.

I feel like it's happening again.
So I'll stay away.

Away. 

Oct 24th RNA's birthday.

Life is a journey. Enjoy every mile. 
It isn't where you live, it is how you live. Live well my friend.
Thanks for being someone that I can talk to and share stories with.
Words can't say how much happiness I wish for you. 
Have a blast. Happy Birthday! 

My very first post.

I don't want to forget. So maybe this is a way.